


we'll find a cure to all our bad deeds (and maybe we'll be redeemed)

by MarcellaBianca



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: First Kiss, Maybe - Freeform, POV Sirius Black, Pining, Remus Lupin Needs a Hug, Shrieking Shack, To Be Continued, Werewolf Remus Lupin, Young Love, Young Remus Lupin, Young Sirius Black, i have never written for this fandom, they deserve a happy ending god dammit, this will probably have porn eventually
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-12-24
Updated: 2018-12-24
Packaged: 2019-09-26 06:26:45
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,515
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17136683
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MarcellaBianca/pseuds/MarcellaBianca
Summary: It’s been a few hours, and Sirius can’t study.Three more inches of this damned Care of Magical Creatures essay, and all the while, his own magical creature was in dire need of care. He’s seen when Remus comes back, scratched and bloody to hell, all his own making.





	we'll find a cure to all our bad deeds (and maybe we'll be redeemed)

**Author's Note:**

  * For [OnMyShore](https://archiveofourown.org/users/OnMyShore/gifts).



> Happy Christmas, Lindsay!!! She requested soft Sirius/Lupin, and while I did try to make it soft, the angst just crept in. Because I am insufferable. 
> 
> Note: This is my first ever foray into HP fanfic. Like. This is my first crack at it, ever. Please be gentle. I love Harry Potter but it's not my main fandom, so I had to do a ton of research. 
> 
> This is based on the fact that Sirius, James, and Peter used to go and visit Lupin when he was in the Shrieking Shack during the full moon days. The reason they became Animagi in the first place was to make sure Remus didn't feel so alone. Which. Just. Makes. Me. *SOBS*

It’s been a few hours, and Sirius can’t study.

Three more inches of this damned Care of Magical Creatures essay, and all the while, his own magical creature was in dire need of care. He’s seen when Remus comes back, scratched and bloody to hell, all his own making.  


* * *

 

_At first, Remus resists._

_“We don’t want you going at this alone,” James insists. Next to him, Peter nods emphatically. Sirius is next to Remus as they huddle together near the fireplace. The next full moon is in two days._

_“No.”_

_“We can all transfigure well enough now,” Sirius says quietly._

_“I don’t want you lot to get hurt,” he grits out, his voice still so tender, so kind. “It’s not your doing, what I am. You don’t need to protect me.”_

_“Somebody’s got to save you from yourself, you numpty,” Sirius teases, but he places a hand on Remus’s back._ I’m here, _it says._ I will always be here.  


* * *

  
Usually, Sirius would wait for James and Peter, to get them all together. But James is in Quidditch practice, and Peter is still nose-deep in his Arithmancy homework.

They won’t even know he’s gone until he gets to the Shack.

He follows the tunnels until he gets to the base of the Willow, pokes the knot.

 

When he gets to the underground door, he waits. Remus will be in his full form now, unable to answer. Instead, Sirius takes out the key Remus had given him the last time they all visited, and slips it in the lock, pushing the door open enough so that when he transfigures he can just nudge the door out of the way.

The transfiguration process is always slightly painful, but when he knows Remus was waiting, it suddenly doesn't feel so bad to have his muscles pop and shrink, his jaw lengthen, his teeth sharpen. It couldn’t be nearly as awful as what awaited Remus every month. And Remus doesn't have a choice. Sirius could do this with a flick of his hand. Remus is bound to this horrific life.

But he doesn't have to go it alone.

When he enters, Sirius sees nothing at first - just the spare room that looks like a tornado hit it. And indeed, one did. His eyes adjust, and it’s only then Sirius claps eyes on a whining, snarling Remus in full fur, pressed against the near wall. Blood oozes from a slash in his side; he must have just scratched himself, if only to keep the hunger at bay.

Sirius tilts his head to the side, and pads forward slowly, methodically. He’d learned his lesson last winter, when he’d charged forward and Remus had nearly bitten his head off.

Remus sniffs the air, then lets out a terrible howl, the kind that all the neighboring villages will point to when they call the Shack haunted. It’s not a threat, more a sound of pain. Sirius wishes there was a way to help him. Not until the moon disappears.

But this? This he can do.

He dares to tip his head, to nuzzle at Remus’s unbruised side. Remus takes in a deep breath, the tension fading from his long frame. It fills Sirius up, the way he can comfort him.

(Sirius isn’t sure when he started loving Remus.)

They stay like that for a long time, the time seeming to stop in the long night. Thankfully it was near spring, and the air was warm. Sirius can’t even imagine what it must be like when the winter comes, what it was like before they all found out about Remus.

Visceral hate spreads through Sirius at the thought of anyone harming Remus.

His Remus.

( It’s just been that way, for as long as he’s known him, since they met five years ago.)

The moon slowly disappears against the pale black of the sky.

(He can’t be around him and not want him. Remus and his kind eyes, his shabby clothes, the way his entire being asserts that he can take care of himself, but Sirius wants so badly to take care of him anyway.)

He dares it, sticking his tongue out to lick the side of Remus’ furry face. He tastes blood, sweat, and underneath it - warmth.

(He’s never had this with anyone. There’s no one else that gives Sirius this specific ache, this urge that sits right underneath his ribs.)

The werewolf starts, and stares over at Sirius as if to recognize him. A bolt of fear steals through Sirius. Too much? But no - the werewolf makes a sound that almost resembles a sigh, and relaxes.

All too soon, the sun breaks over the horizon and Remus pulls away from Sirius, in a crouch as the pain hits his body. The transformation back into a human is much less dire, but it still looks awful, and Sirius transfigures back to himself to support Remus’s weight.

(He wants. Great Merlin’s _beard_ , he wants.)

“Ow.” Remus ruefully rubs the cut on his arm, checking if the blood has clotted. It smears a little. “Wouldn’t suppose you’d have any bandages on you, eh?”

“I have some in the tunnel,” Sirius murmurs, looping an arm around Remus’s shoulders. He pauses a moment, cherishes the weight of Remus on him.

If there’s any thought in Remus’ head of the lick Sirius gave him, he doesn’t mention it. Nor would Sirius want him to. But it’s a small stab in his gut just the same.

(God, to have Remus against him. In any way.)

Remus is exhausted when they make it up to the common room, and Sirius can barely get him in bed before he’s falling into a deep sleep, limbs tucked up inside the blankets that Sirius drapes over the fragile body of the boy - the man - he would kill the entire wizarding world to protect.

He drags himself over to his own bed and is out faster than you can say Golden Snitch.  


* * *

  
When he wakes, it’s with a small start. Remus is standing above him. It’s nightfall again. It was a Saturday when Remus had to be at the shack, so they were able to sleep the Sunday away. But now Remus is standing above him, hands squeezing into fists only to release a moment later. His face, though - his face is still so soft, despite the confusion creasing his brow.

“You.”

“Hmm?” Sirius props himself up on his elbows, squinting. “What, what did I do?” Quickly his mind tracks back what he could have missed on a Sunday. That homework still needed doing. Damn it all. Hagrid would probably make him clean the troughs for the Blast-Ended Skrewts.

“When I was at the shack. You -” Remus pauses, struggling for words. He touches the side of his face, then slips it down. Perfectly mimicking the trail of when Sirius licked him.

Sheer terror curdles Sirius’ stomach. “I. Er. Um.”

 _Great language skills there, Black_ his mind screams at him. But before he can say anything, do anything, his mind and heart are interrupted by Remus climbing up onto the bed, sitting on his legs to stop him from doing anything foolish like throwing himself out the Gryffindor Tower window.

“You didn’t tell me.” Remus says, voice still utterly soft and controlled. For being a werewolf, knew how to be so utterly quiet and still that it both enthralled and scared Sirius. He wanted to know what that stillness was like. Wanted to be inside of it.

“I...I wanted you to know I was there,” Sirius finally says, once he got his brain to send words to his mouth. He sits up a bit more, and dares to move his hand to the center of Remus’ chest, letting it hover. “I needed you to -”

“To what?” Remus sounds like he’s on the verge of either turning back into the wolf, or shattering apart.

Sirius places his hand square at the left side of Remus’ chest. “To know I knew your heart.”

The world is utterly still as Remus holds his breath, holds Sirius suspended, air and body and heart and soul.

“You stupid git,” Remus manages, and before Sirius can make sense of it, his lap is filled with Remus. All the gangling length of him, sprawled into Sirius’ arms like he belongs there (and he does, fuck, he does).

Sirius makes a sound from deep inside his chest. If it were any louder, it could be a wolf’s howl. His hand goes to cup Remus’ cheek; the other leaves his chest to join it. He brushes his thumbs back, memorizing the hollow, the contour, the concave.

“I know your heart,” he murmurs.

“I know yours, too,” Remus replies.

And then Remus is kissing him, kissing him so softly but with _intent_ , with a _plan_. His lips are so gentle, so sweet, and Sirius instinctively wants to hunt down everyone who has ever made Remus feel like he’s less than human for being what he is. Remus is here, alive, and warm, so warm, in his arms.

The moon, although waning, fills the room with light.

**Author's Note:**

> There will obviously be a sequel. And the sequel will obviously have porn in it. But I couldn't get it together to write that one before Christmas. 
> 
> song title - "Bonnie and Clyde" by Martina Sorbara.


End file.
